Loving Your Children Enough

Today is Monday….Monday’s at my home are always full of adventure. We always spend the day catching up from the weekend and trying to get organized for the upcoming week. I’m trying to re-plan for the week so this actually takes place on Friday or Saturday….but I’m not there yet!

This weekend was good. My hubby is home after traveling the latter part of this last week. It seems his trip went well and so today I am thankful for his trip to have went well. 🙂

I’m also thankful it seems our cub scout group has settled the latest crisis. The first year is always hard. You really have to work hard to iron out the wrinkles but once it’s done it’s a great program for little boys. We have loved our scouting experience.

I’m not sure if I mentioned it or not, but I did hear from my friend Tanya again late last week. Her Dad came through his surgery easily…I don’t think they got the expected results so please continue to pray over his shoulder.

I’m thankful to have the Amber alert system added to my website. Paul added it this morning. I know just seeing it makes me more aware of my surroundings….especially the children I see when I am out and about. I hope it will have the same effect on others who see it. I’ve never had a child missing but if I did, I would want everyone in the world looking for them.

Today’s prayer requests are:

My Mom. She has a follow up with her surgeon today.

For my family. We are really praying about the content of our websites. I’ve mentioned before, we know that this is supposed to be a ministry to others…I feel that everything in my life up until this point has led to me being able to share the things that I will be able to share through this site and others as well as, hopefully(!), continued speaking engagements. I know that my mission in life is to teach that Titus 2/Proverbs 31 message to women. Unfortunately, it’s not being taught very many other places these days.

What I’m learning this week:

There are gems hiding in the pages of old books. Some of my favorite books are books that I’ve found at the thrift store. There pages hold so much wisdom!

That I really can learn web programming!! Now, I’m no Bill Gates but I thought I was a hopeless case. I’m proud to say I’ve learned (am learning), to use the HTML editor in Text Pad on our computer. I can now (hold your applause, please), put the first letter of each of my blogs in BOLD FACE!! Are you proud? Seriously, I am beginning to see a rhyme and a reason to this editing stuff….maybe one day I’ll be able to add pictures too! : )

Getting up late always runs your day behind.
Our power went off at some point last night and since the alarm didn’t go off we have been dragging all day. I hate for a day to start like that, especially a Monday! I guess I just have to know that God had other plans….”I will be a tree, I will bend….”.

Today’s scripture meditation continues with:

Titus 2:4-5

“Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. NIV

and

1 Cor 13:4-8

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
(NIV)

We were discussing how to love a child. Here’s where we get to the gray (or really not so gray…you just have to stay focused on the truth) areas.

There are those times that you will show your children kindness, and be patient and not be rude and look out for their self interests and they will still be just hard to live with! When you give so much of yourself to someone so precious to you, it’s hard to understand why they wouldn’t respect and obey.

The beautiful thing about the Bible for parents is that the entire book is about families. Families of all sizes, shapes and colors. Families like yours, and families like mine. Everything we need to know about how to raise a family is between the covers of that living book.

What does the Bible have to say about loving a child?

Prov 13:24

“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”

(NIV)

If we love our children, not only will we do all the things mentioned in 1 Corinthians, but we must also discipline our children.

Child training (which is what you are doing if you love your child) is much like growing a tiny plant. We have to plant seeds…we have to give them good dirt, and sunlight (SONlight!), and water them. We have to prune away the undesirable parts and make sure that they grow straight and tall.

When we discipline our children, we are taking away those undesired parts and instead, redirecting our children toward a walk with the Lord.

It is through discipline that we actually teach children our love for them.

Prov 3:11-12
“My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.”

(NIV)

Notice the last part of this verse…”as a father, the son he delights in”….this father disciplines his son and the result is a son that he can delight in. There is no mystery here…no magic pill. Just the plain and simple fact. Do you believe the Word….will you take it for what it says? If so then you must rest in the promise that if you discipline your child properly, you will end up with a child who will bring you joy and not shame.

Prov 29:15
“The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.”
(NIV)

Prov 29:17
“Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul.”
(NIV)

Let’s go one step further…before you throw your hands up and say that you know all of this and you still can’t seem to get your child to behave let’s see what the Bible has to say about this:

1 Tim 3:4-5
“He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)
(NIV)

You aren’t even supposed to be working in your church if your children won’t obey you! God set child training as a priority in a Believer’s life.

Train them young…set your sights on developing good character and obedience while they are still little. Rudeness, lying and disrespect are never cute, even when they are very little.

We work really hard when our children are young. As a result, we usually get positive comments about our children and rarely, if ever, have to discipline the oldest children in my home anymore.

Be consistent. We *NEVER* make threats. We *ALWAYS* follow through. If we tell our child one time to get in the car and he does not stop what he is doing and get in the car, he will suffer consequences. (For the record, if I don’t follow my God given mandate to train him, we’re in a parking lot and I tell him to get in the car and he doesn’t obey….I might also suffer a consequence far greater, I might not have my son anymore.)

I can tell you that there have been times whether sick, pregnant, or for some other reason I have not stayed behind them the way I should..I can always tell within just a couple of days. It’s a process, it’s not something that you do just one or two days and expect it to be done.

Being consistent and making threats, by the way, are the biggest problems I see with parents today. I’m amazed at the moms who will say I’ve tried everything but they are actually making a lot of threats and never following through. Teach your child you mean what you say and you say what you’ll do! They need to know they can always trust their parents…even in this!

Love your children enough to give them a good start in life.


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