We’ve been working right at a month to prepare mom’s house to sell.
The little things, I think, are what bring me to tears. They just remind me of her so very much. I feel like I could just run my hands across them and almost feel her with me.
I decided to snap some pictures of this bathroom. Mama had hand painted roses around the top of the room and scripture above the light fixture. She had also stenciled roses on the ceiling. You may not have noticed them at first since they were white but it was just a few shades different from the ceiling …delicate and beautiful. The had the most perfect roses hanging above the window with sweet curtains. I had decided to leave them in place because they made me smile when I walked down her hall as I’ve worked in her home.
It’s a long story, but they aren’t there now. Of course, neither is she. I find myself wishing I could go back to January when life felt so normal. It’s selfish, I know. This timing would plant my mom right in the middle of her own horrible pain. I know she doesn’t hurt now.
Some days, I feel like I can’t breathe for the grief that I’m feeling. There is this huge gaping hole now that just lingers.
I miss her so much I hurt.